Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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