Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
