I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize