Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
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Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
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Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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