I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
