Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
