So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
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She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize