turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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