he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
