I have demons in me.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
is wine microwaveable?
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he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
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I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize