What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
