eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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