And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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