Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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