Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
