Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.