Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
