she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
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