Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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