drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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