I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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