Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize