Sponge bath it is.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize