Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Randomize
