Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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