I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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