Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
