ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Hippo gnu deer
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
