You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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