"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
