seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize