the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
