Screwed.edu
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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