i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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