shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
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It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
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I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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