Whod you bang
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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