No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
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