You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
