first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
