i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
