): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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