And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
