So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize