Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
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I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
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When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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