Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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