i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
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he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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