I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Randomize
