She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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