every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
