You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize